If I am looking for the rest of me within someone else,
I am setting myself and my relationship up for failure.

You complete me is a lovely but destructive notion. It trumpets that I am less than whole but with you I can be restored! That is a lot of pressure to put on a partner! The bottom line is that you need to figure out what is missing in you and restore yourself back to whole before you can pick a life partner who will be a good match for the whole you. You can't look for that in someone else. You are the one who banished your missing parts, and you are the only one who can restore your banished parts and make yourself whole again.